Peace, be still

I was looking at a photo of Reed from a year ago, marveling at how much his face/whole self has changed. I realized, too, that we've been here in Grand Prairie for almost six months--and marveling over that, too. Then I was thinking about how I have grown and changed in the last year--or just the last six months--and my brain just about imploded.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still very much myself. I still struggle in the same ways, and I still triumph over the same successes. But one major difference is that I feel more peace these days. I think it has very little to do with where I am geographically--and everything to do with where I am personally.

When we first moved here, I had what I suppose was a crisis of faith. The change was drastic enough, drawn-out enough, and unexpected enough that I felt....angry. Angry, bitter, and confused as to why (I felt) my repeated prayers for relief and help weren't being answered. So one day I said it aloud--to Phill, while I was in the midst of a really dark moment--"I'm just so mad at Him." And right after I said it, I wished I hadn't. It was like being a child, and shouting something horribly hurtful to your mother or father. I felt deep and immediate shame, and found myself praying for forgiveness all day, until at the end of the day, I knew I could stop. I knew that Heavenly Father was well-aware of my pain, and wanted to help me. I knew, too, that I had been stubbornly refusing to do what I had been prompted to do--what would really help me.

I still feel lonely, out of place, and impatient from time to time. Sometimes I feel lonely or depressed for an extended period of time. And sometimes I feel, still, like I'm failing at everything important, or that my life is so chaotic that I can't catch my breath. At times I feel that I have made no progress.

But in general, I feel more capable and more believing than I have for a very long time. And really grateful and aware of so many blessings being poured out upon my family and me. I try to take a minute each day to just quickly write on my dry-erase board a few things I'm grateful for. I know it's something that has been shown time and again to make people happier. I believed that, I just felt really overwhelmed by the concept of a "gratitude journal". So I decided to be ultra-casual about it and go with the dry-erase calendar on my kitchen wall. Every time I look at my list, be it long or short, I feel happier noticing the ways that God blesses me every day. I feel like remembering how He's watching over me enables me to handle the setbacks and difficulties with greater grace and--here's that word again--peace.

I feel like although I have the same issues and heartaches, when I'm praying, reading my scriptures, and just writing down the blessings I find, the problems I do have become tiny enough that I could just put them in my pocket. Still present, but manageable. Not so devastating. A learning tool, instead of a traumatic injury to my soul.

 Sometimes we suffer hardships or struggle to overcome weaknesses for what feels an uncommonly long time. Sometimes it is an uncommonly long time before we finally see the full dividends of well-endured strife. But I know that in the meantime, we can have comfort, we can know that the Savior is there, ever-ready to extend His hand, and we can feel peace that surpasses understanding.

In sacrament meeting one Sunday, we sung a hymn that I think I've always liked, but maybe just didn't pay much attention to before. Now it has become something that I think of so often, and sometimes just crave to hear. It reminds me that we are never forgotten.

Master, the Tempest is Raging

1. Master, the tempest is raging!
The billows are tossing high!
The sky is o’ershadowed with blackness.
No shelter or help is nigh.
Carest thou not that we perish?
How canst thou lie asleep
When each moment so madly is threat’ning
A grave in the angry deep?

 The winds and the waves shall obey thy will:
Peace, be still.
Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea
Or demons or men or whatever it be,
No waters can swallow the ship where lies
The Master of ocean and earth and skies.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, be still; peace, be still.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, peace, be still.

2. Master, with anguish of spirit
I bow in my grief today.
The depths of my sad heart are troubled.
Oh, waken and save, I pray!
Torrents of sin and of anguish
Sweep o’er my sinking soul,
And I perish! I perish! dear Master.
Oh, hasten and take control!

 The winds and the waves shall obey thy will:
Peace, be still.
Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea
Or demons or men or whatever it be,
No waters can swallow the ship where lies
The Master of ocean and earth and skies.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, be still; peace, be still.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, peace, be still.

3. Master, the terror is over.
The elements sweetly rest.
Earth’s sun in the calm lake is mirrored,
And heaven’s within my breast.
Linger, O blessed Redeemer!
Leave me alone no more,
And with joy I shall make the blest harbor
And rest on the blissful shore.

 The winds and the waves shall obey thy will:
Peace, be still.
Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea
Or demons or men or whatever it be,
No waters can swallow the ship where lies
The Master of ocean and earth and skies.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, be still; peace, be still.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, peace, be still.

Natalie Norton: An Embarrassingly Shiny Tribute

I was on a roll for a minute there, wasn't I? And then 10 days with no posts? Ah, well. No matter. I'm all for starting over!

I had the incredible opportunity to attend Natalie Norton's Breathe Intensive last Tuesday. I feel like singing from the rooftops about it, believe me, but I also don't know where to start--I'm still processing half the stuff she so generously taught us. I just have to say, because it will be such empty silence if I don't SAY what my heart is singing so loud--that Natalie is one of the most wonderful people I've met, and to know her (even just to meet her) is to love her. She felt like my fifth sister. She radiates light and goodness and warmth, and while I'm obviously pretty agog at her talent, like a crazy fan (that I am), she remains so friendly and relatable. {Dear Spell Check, will you stop underlining relatable? I tried spelling it four different ways and STILL you insist on that ugly red squiggle. There is no pleasing you.} I was also touched by the beautiful women who attended the intensive. Their stories were poignant and powerful, and I feel like I am forever changed. I really could go on ad nauseum {REALLY, Spell Check?! N-A-U-S-E-U-M!....really?! No soup for you.}about how wonderful the intensive was and how wonderful Natalie is, but just know that I am fired up and so excited about my next steps! I'm still puzzling about what those next steps might be, but I've got an inkling, and it does involve, at the very least, THIS....and I mean it this time. I'm so ready.

"....thank you for being a friend..."

{I couldn't do without the Golden Girls theme song quote for this post. Just so hilariously appropriate.}

My sisters tend to love the people I love. And I tend to love their friends, too, either through them or when I ever meet them.

Sometimes I'm full to bursting with appreciation for my sisters' friends, and I want to shout from the rooftops about it, so this blog is my roof at the moment:

Friends of my sisters, THANK YOU! Thank you for calling them when you feel prompted to do so. Thank you for bringing them dinner when they are so sick they can hardly move. Thank you for watching their children so they can go on dates with their wonderful husbands. Thank you for praying for them, for crying with them, for laughing with them, and for loving them as they are, in all their beauty and complexity. 

If I could be there every moment any of my sisters need me, I WOULD...but I can't. And I do believe that is one of the many beautiful reasons we have friends in this life. So THANK YOU, sweet friends of my sisters, for doing what you do!

My Family: A Series

My friend Jenn once said to me that she wishes she had a little directory of all my siblings, so that when I mention them (as I often do), she'd know just who I was talking about. I started to do just that--gathering a photo of each of them, compiling little factoids about each of them, and then I became very overwhelmed and stopped.

I was realizing, though, that I do the same thing here--I mention my siblings a lot, and I do often share personal memories that involve them--but I wish I could introduce each one of them to you. One of the things I love about my sisters is that they tend to love and care for anyone I love and care for. Friends included. Which means that my sisters, by extension, care about you, my readers and friends, and love you, too....and although some of you readers know each one of my sisters, I thought it would be fun to do a little series about them, and my brothers, and my parents.

So hold on to your hats! As soon as I have the first "interview" compiled, I'm posting it! I'm so excited for you to "meet" my family.

Down to Earth

-OR- {Pardon the Wait While We Were Growing}

*I will include pictures in the post below this. Too many to include in this already-arduous post!
Recently our lives have been less predictable than usual. We have had a couple of interruptions, blips on the radar, so to speak, that have added some curves to our winding road.

There was my sinus surgery, which knocked me off my feet for two weeks, and then dampened my spirit for another month afterward. I felt the chaos of this interruption and tried to fight back, but didn't try very hard.

Just when I got my feet planted again, Phill needed surgery for his torn miniscus. Well, that makes it sound like it just popped out of nowhere....it didn't. We had a month's warning. But again, our "typical" lives were interrupted (just for a short time, this time), and I found myself feeling (again) like I was simply floating around in the debris.

Several times throughout the last few weeks, my resolve to bring more Balance to my life has caused me to cry hysterically or laugh. (Sometimes at the same time.) But slowly, this has blown over, and in its place, something new.

We have become more clear about what we want. More brave in going after it. More calm in the knowledge that no matter how much our lives seem to spin out of our controlling scope, it is always our Savior who keeps us rooted to the ground, safe and at peace.

Often, while our children sleep, Phill and I lay in bed and talk about our dreams. Usually, we dream simply. The things that make us glow with hope aren't usually extravagant.

We would love a big backyard, fenced in, where we can run and play and sit quietly as the summer sun sets and the crickets sing the day down.

We would love a large garden, full of flowers and food, where our children can dig and water and harvest the direct results of their hard work.

We would love a chicken coop, where a couple of chickens provide fresh eggs for our breakfast.

We would love a dog, one that follows the kids around adoringly; one that we can count on to protect me when Phill has to go out of town. The kind of dog you grow up with.

We would love a cat--the kind that has personality, the kind that sleeps on your bed at night, the kind that becomes a fixture of the house.

When we lay in bed at night, imagining these simple happy things, it is not so much them that we want. It's what they represent. Stability. Closeness. Tradition. Roots. The simplicity of plant-and-grow, nurture-and-reap.

For a long time, even these simple things have seemed faraway, and we have had to make do with doing our best to create peace in our home. But recently we experienced something intangible, something that has seemed to propel us in the direction of these things.

We looked at our tiny backyard, our sliver of land, and we saw the possibilities. We finally saw where a little bit of our dream could fit.

And we planted a garden.

6x11, I think, $25, and took us 4.5 hours on Conference Saturday. Small, but adequate. Small, but still the realizing of one part of our dream! A row each of cucumbers, lettuce, spinach, sweet corn, banana peppers, tomatoes, a strawberry plant and some dahlias. Inside the house in a little yellow pot grows mint; minuscule seedlings are sprouting all over. They look like tiny green hairs. And yesterday while Phill watered the garden, he shouted from outside to me, "Rae! We have lettuce!" I ran outside (yes, I ran--don't you know gardening is exciting?) and nearly cried when I saw the row of perfect little green clusters. So small you wouldn't spot them if you weren't looking.

But there.

Oddly enough, other aspects of our "Grand Dream" are falling into place, almost by accident. Reed's class hatched chicks, and we were able to enjoy two of them for a few days before we took them to a friend with a coop.

A friend's Boxer had puppies, and we have taken the plunge! We will get our sweet Boxer, Penny Lane, at the end of May. We held her a couple of weeks ago and she felt like ours, like home. Familiar and warm. While I have many fears about training/raising a puppy/dog, I feel deep within that we are on the right track. That this was the direction we meant to go all along.

A short time after we heard about Penny, we saw Jude. A friend emailed us and told us that he knew someone giving away kittens. We picked up our creamsicle-colored kitten yesterday. He played on the couch with me for a long time, and slept on Phill's pillow. He is curious, playful, and affectionate. He belongs.

I am aware that a garden, a puppy, and a kitten ALL require WORK. And that is precisely why I think we are finding some peace. We are back to the basics. The cause-and-effect, err-and-learn, change-and-grow up-and-down that is the best stuff of life.

When I was a very new mom and feeling unsure of how to live my new life in conjunction with everything I wanted to do outside the home, I wrote a plaintive email to my free-spirited and beautiful-spirited brother, Isaac. His gentle response was to say that when he feels unsatisfied or un-anchored, he returns to Mother Earth. (Literally and figuratively) Then he said something that has stayed with me, and propelled me through my spare stretches: "Rae, the grass isn't greener....it's blue."

It isn't better over there. It's just different. And it's all grass.
We choose our happiness. We make our peace. We decide whether to find a way to make it work.
I--we--can choose to grow, even in the smallest of spaces.

Did you think that your feet had been bound
By what gravity brings to the ground?
Did you feel you were tricked
By the future you picked?
Well, come on down

All those rules don’t apply
When you’re high in the sky
So, come on down
Come on down

We’re coming down to the ground
There’s no better place to go
We’ve got snow up on the mountains
We’ve got rivers down below

We’re coming down to the ground
We hear the birds sing in the trees
And the land will be looked after
We send the seeds out in the breeze

Did you think you’d escaped from routine
By changing the script and the scene?
Despite all you made of it
You’re always afraid
Of the change

You’ve got a lot on your chest
Well, you can come as my guest
So come on down
Come on down

We’re coming down to the ground
There’s no better place to go
We’ve got snow up on the mountains
We’ve got rivers down below

We’re coming down to the ground
We hear the birds sing in the trees
And the land will be looked after
We send the seeds out in the breeze

Like the fish in the ocean
We felt at home in the sea
We learned to live off the good land
Learned to climb up a tree
Then we got up on two legs
But we wanted to fly
When we messed up our homeland
We set sail for the sky

We’re coming down to the ground
There’s no better place to go
We’ve got snow up on the mountains
We’ve got rivers down below

We’re coming down to the ground
We hear the birds sing in the trees
And the land will be looked after
We send the seeds out in the breeze

We’re coming down
Coming down to Earth
Like babies at birth
Coming down to Earth
We’re gonna find new priorities
These are extraordinary qualities

We’re coming down to the ground
There’s no better place to go
We’ve got snow up on the mountains
We’ve got rivers down below

We’re coming down to the ground
We hear the birds sing in the trees
And the land will be looked after
We send the seeds out in the breeze

We’re coming down to the ground
There’s no better place to go
We’ve got snow up on the mountains
We’ve got rivers down below

We’re coming down to the ground
We hear the birds sing in the trees
And the land will be looked after
We send the seeds out in the breeze

We’re gonna find new priorities
These are extraordinary qualities

--Down to Earth, Peter Gabriel

Down to Earth: The Photos

My new favorite

After a really sweet experience with Reed and this song, and after having had two recent chances to sing it and closely examine the lyrics, I Know That My Redeemer Lives is safely my favorite hymn.

It fixes me.

It reaches into my soul and heals all the little broken parts, and I feel peace start from the top of my head to the bottom of my toes.

How couldn't I feel that way, with lyrics like this?

I know that my redeemer lives
What comfort this sweet sentence gives
He lives! He lives who once was dead
He lives! my ever-living friend

He lives! To bless me with his love
He lives! To plead for me above
He lives! My hungry soul to feed
He lives! To bless in time of need

He lives! To grant me
He lives! To guide me with his light
He lives! To comfort me went faint
He lives! To hear my soul's complaint

He lives! To silence all my fears
He lives! To wipe away my tears
He lives! To calm my troubled heart
He lives! With blessings to impart

He lives to calm my troubled heart--that is His purpose, all those things listed in every verse.
He literally lives for us.

This morning,

Savvy was in the bed sleeping next to me, her back to my chest and her little body curved in the same shape as mine, her arms wrapped around her "lemur" {her beloved d.i.-bought one-eyed stuffed cheetah, her BABY}. She slowly turned around to face me with her wild sleepy eyes {beautiful, so beautiful} and then put her hand on my cheek, and said quieter than a whisper, "I wuv you." Then turned over, pressing her little back into my chest and grabbing my arm to wrap around her tummy, and fell asleep again.

HUGE woops.

Sometimes I assume everyone is on Facebook. Sorry. Stupid assumption.

In case you haven't heard, it's the most wonderful news EVER--

PHILL IS NOT GOING. They need him here more than they need him in Afghanistan because they're standing up a new unit here.

I found out two days into my sinus-thing recovery and sobbed with joy, which, well, really hurt my face. But I didn't care. Best news ever. :)

I love this quote. It made me hopeful before we had this amazing break in things, and it makes me hopeful now that I'll be able to handle all the other little things on my "list" of human woes.

"If you are helpless, he is not. If you are lost, he is not. If you don't know what to do next, he knows. It would take a miracle, you say? Well, if it takes a miracle, why not?" -President Boyd K. Packer, speaking of the Savior

A new smella

As lots of you know, I had my sinus surgery/septum surgery on Tuesday.

Phill reassured me by saying I'd feel hardly- to no-pain at all.

I have learned that the DOCTOR is the one to listen to in matters like these....not my beefcake of a husband who has a nose that can handle this sort of extreme plumbing.

I woke up from surgery feeling like my nose was on fire. I quietly writhed, trying not to make a scene (why? why did I care that badly?) while they gave me something a tad stronger than morphine. Then I talked to the sweet nurse (Steve, you were awesome) while I floated in and out of my face.

Long story short: My recovery has been going well, though I have learned that my stomach hates pain meds and antibiotics.

My dear friend Jenn came to stay for the weekend because Phill had drill (yes....I know), and I can't thank her enough for her selfless service. Phill has been my bedside angel, seeing to it that no need goes unmet. I am grateful for the obedience of my children through this last week, without which we would have no hair.

I am humbled by the help of so many friends--dinners, babysitting, rides, etc....I say it a lot, but only because it's true: I am so grateful for your help.

Lastly. I am not very sophisticated, I confess. Because after having stints and gauze and heaven knows what pulled from my face today, and finally being able to SMELL, and wondering how things would TASTE with my newly plumbed nose, all I wanted was Taco Bell.

And I bit into that soft chicken taco and spilled tears of joy when I said, "Oh hello, Sour Cream. I don't believe we've met!"

Here's to smelling/tasting anew! I'm still sore, but I already know it was worth it!

Love you back

All you dear ones,
that's you, you who read this blog,
thank you.

Every time I post something which has received my utmost effort in writing,
something I am happy about and poured my creative heart into,
and you say how much you loved it
or that you love my writing
or that it brought you comfort or laughter or anything else good

my heart swells and my soul sings

you feed my creative spirit
you dear ones, you who read this blog,
you are the soft landing place for my creative endeavors and the things I need to share

thank you
thank you

thank you

Something weird this way came....

(Possibly the worst post title ever?)
Something really weird happened this morning.

I woke up at 7:41, 19 minutes before my alarm was set to go off, and I didn't feel like I was going to die! (When usually I hit the snooze until it is 8:32.)

Not only did I feel actually refreshed and well-rested (what on EARTH?), I actually thought that I could manage to fit in a little bit of exercise before feeding the kids and getting Reed to school....

and even MORE weird? I did. I DID exercise. In the morning. Before everything else needed to happen.

It was nothing short of miraculous, and quite honestly, I can only see this as 1% the result of my recently increased efforts (trying to be better about keeping the house clean, organizing, going to bed at a normal hour, etc.) and 99% heaven smiling down on me.

It had to have been divine intervention, because this doesn't often happen to me.

But it was awesome, really awesome, and it made my day.



(For something that's ALSO awesome and might just make YOUR day, go see what The DI Denizen did with her kitchen!)

Doctrine & Covenants 128:22

Can you tell what the subject was of my study this morning? :)

"...shall we not go on in so great a cause? Go forward and not backward. Courage...and on, on to the victory! Let your hearts rejoice, and be exceedingly glad. Let the earth break forth into singing."

2 Timothy 1:7

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

lately

I have had lots more (than usual) to do lately, and lots to contemplate as Phill's reserve unit gets their list soon of soldiers deploying to Afghanistan this year (woke up with my stomach in knots every morning the last few days, wondering if he will be going this time), so it follows that I have had some darker, heavier moments the last few days. Several times I simply shut down--or broke down. But through this somewhat rocky couple of weeks, I have been humbled to see the hand of the Lord in my life--through other people. One in particular, my dear friend Sarah, has been quietly sustaining me through these last few days that have really tested just how much I can do and how much faith I can develop (I'm getting there...slowly but surely). I want her to know how grateful I am that she allows herself to be directed towards those who need her strong spirit. I definitely do.

My beloved sisters and friends have surprised me with perfectly-timed phone calls or emailed words of encouragement or good humor, and have made daily life sweeter.

My precious children have behaved uncommonly well, and have gone the extra mile to do their part when there is lots to be done.

My willing husband laid his hands on my head last night to offer me words of comfort from our father in heaven, and soothed my troubled soul.

I do know that if Phill has to be deployed this time, I will not be lacking a strong support system. I am surrounded on every side.

Last, a quote from President Spencer W. Kimball--"God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs. Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other."

Source here

and we dance

I know I say it a lot, but it's only because it's true: I feel immeasurably blessed/humbled to be married to Phill. And I'm only saying it again right now because it's a lead-in to my favorite part of today (so far, I still have some chocolate to eat and reading to do):

Phill dancing in our living room to "Let It Be" and "Hey Jude" with Savvy holding onto his fingers (this includes bouncing up and down as if jumping rope....incredibly exhausting, but little 2-year-olds do it for five minutes non-stop without breaking a sweat), and the boys rocking out nearby in their respective styles. (Jaxon laying lax on the couch, nodding his head up and down, chill as can be; Reed running around in circles, somersaulting, and bellowing with abject happiness.) We laughed so much tonight that my stomach hurts....Savvy was using a light saber as a microphone stand (she caught some Fergie today with me on TV; Glamorous held her spellbound)

The boys are in their beds, with their headphones in and their mp3 players on. Reed is singing, "NAA-NA-NA-NAAAA....HEEEYY JUUUDE" at the top of his lungs (unaware, of course, of how loud he is being to the rest of us), and Jaxon has his eyes closed, only quietly humming here and there, off in dreamy Hendrixland.

Oh, these babies. I used to wonder what it meant when people said, "My heart swells with joy"....and I am telling you, I get it. I feel like my heart is so full, at times like these when we are all laughing and smiling and connected and dancing and free, I wonder that my heart doesn't simply beat its way out of its cage of ribs.

Awarded

Well, bless my soul! (Say it with a Southern accent. It will sound better.) I have been given the Honest Scrap Award from my fellow blogger, Rae!

That's right--Rae. We share a name, as well as an interest in blogging and photography, and a willingness to serve with the Scouts when asked. (Examine the last part of that sentence closely. I am delicately phrasing my true feelings about that particular calling, which I have had no less than three times.) Rae is funny, easy to get along with, hard-working, creative, and kind. She is definitely one of my favorite bloggers!

So along with the award, I have some responsibilities.

1) I must thank the person who gave the award and list their blog and link it.
2) Share "10 Honest Things" about myself.
3) Present this award to 7 others whose blogs I find brilliant in content and/or design, or those who have encouraged me.
4) Tell those 7 people they've been awarded HONEST SCRAP and inform them of these guidelines in receiving the award.

10 Honest Things
About Me

1 - I hate when men have long nails. As in a teensy bit of white showing. Call me picky or old-fashioned--I just don't like it! I like a man's hands to look...MANLY.

2 - Last week I bought a shirt designed by Miley Cyrus (or the designer they picked to make things that Miley could put her name on).

3 - I make up random (and ridiculous) songs a lot. When I was still at home, my sisters (okay, just the younger sisters) and I made up songs on the fly quite often. My personal favorites: "Do You Like My Black Shirt? I Do" and "Do Your Armpits Smell Like..." (I will not finish the rest of that title.)

4 - I still sometimes dance like a crazy person when I'm all alone in my room. Once Phill walked in, and I almost cried with embarrassment. Sweet man that he is, he just smiled. The biggest smile I've ever seen. As in: If I don't keep smiling hugely, I will be laughing within seconds.

5 - My first job was on an Army base in the security clearance section. I got to ogle cute soldiers (and sometimes read their files), read mysteries, email friends, and listen to U2.

6 - I love shopping at D.I., but I'm telling you, there is a smell, and it is weird, and I do have to concentrate a little to forget about it when I walk in. It's worth the good deals, though.

7 - I often wish that I had an incredibly useful skill (besides photography and, well, baby-rearing), and every time I go past the crafts book section of Barnes & Noble, I am stalled for a good 30 minutes, dreaming of the new talent I will acquire. "Oooooo, beading!! I will have beaded pillows decorating the whole house!" -or- "Basket Weaving! I will have an Etsy shop and a booth at the fair and a whole BUSINESS of basket weaving! Underwater, even!" -or- "How to Become a Carpenter in 30 Days?! I WILL become a carpenter! I'll build EVERYTHING for the house!" True, I am ambitious and interested and idealistic. Most of these ideas fall flat right out of the gate, but one day, I am sure I will find a new endeavor that will latch on with ferocity.

8 - I LOVE notebooks. Paper of all kinds, really, but....notebooks. Which are a close cousin to books--just gloriously blank. I have to resist the urge to buy every moleskine notebook I see, every attractively-decorated journal, every package of pretty paper. It is bad. Very bad. I have banned myself from notebook-buying for a couple of years at a time when it was discovered (by a somewhat-shocked Phill) that I had no less than 15 unused notebooks. "Sweetheart, what do you even need these for?" "I don't KNOW! But I WILL need them! Soon! For something!" It is my only tendency towards packratism. Otherwise, I am ruthless in the amount of things I keep "just in case". *Okay. Pencils, too, and pens, and honestly, pretty much all other office supplies.

9 - Sometimes I snort when I laugh.

10 - I come from a rich family tradition of reading aloud to each other. We love to do various voices, and get into the story in an almost comical way. One of my favorite memories is a Christmas at my grandma's house (I think I was 15?) when my brother Isaac read Harry Potter aloud to my younger sisters and I. His voice for Snape was so perfect, so oily, so snake-y. It made us laugh--and him too--every time it came up. My oldest brother, Reed, used to read Roald Dahl books to us when I was little--about 7. His voices were perfect, too. The BFG is one of the first books I remember having read to me, aside from The Book of Mormon and a simple school book.

Now--you seven whom I have nominated:

My brilliant brother-in-law, Eric, over at LDS Prosperity

My beautiful friend and smashing photographer, Marie at MAG GAB

The mother to three beautiful girls and a dear friend, Cyndie at The Secret Lives of Tracys

Another photographer friend (watch out, it's contagious!) of mine who has actually known me since I was born, and is more family than friend--Christy at Life with the Schnegel-kins

My cousin, who continues to inspire me with her own personal growth and progress, Annie at The Delights of Our Lives

My sister, Abby, who manages to post just what I need, when I need it. Check out a particularly humorous post on her blog, Business As Usual.

And lastly--not leastly--Lara at Overstuffed. It's good stuff, people. And she always welcomes new readers, so hop on over and say hi.

I don't like the fact that it only let me nominate 7. There are quite a few more I would have liked to link to--so if you don't see yourself on here, count yourself nominated, anyway, please.

Had to say:

You think I made you guys cry? Well, your comments had me in (happy) tears. What a blessing it is to have friends like you, to have support from you, and to have shared this experience with all of you. I am overcome by gratitude.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for your sweet words.