Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Now!

I've noticed lately that I keep finding myself waiting. Waiting for Phill to get home before I exercise, waiting for Savvy to take a nap before I clean the house, waiting to feel motivated to clean said house, waiting for the dishes to get out of control before I do them, waiting for the laundry to pile up before I realize I'm wading through it, waiting for my children to go to sleep before I pull out a book and some cookies....

And I've realized how silly that is. It's not like I haven't had this "epiphany" before--but I catch myself doing this waiting game ag
ain and again, and each time I realize I'm doing it, it hits me with more force. How silly am I to wait? Granted, there are some things that just have to wait. There will be things every day that will go to the wayside to make room for the things that matter more. But when I start waiting for the things that I like to do--reading, eating cookies, exercising (at least afterwards)--then it spills over into the things I don't feel like doing. (Dishes. Laundry. Vacuuming. Picking up the billion toys and various artifacts from the floor every day. Starting exercising.) And suddenly I find that my priorities are all topsy-turvy. "Oh, wait! I can't do the dishes! I have to....I have to....I have to...." and my mind scrambles for something--ANYTHING--more desirable than the hated dishes. Eventually what happens is that I'm sitting on the couch reading, eating cookies, while my dishes pile up and my floor becomes a veritable minefield of toys and ripped-up circulars (thank you, darling Savvy) and the laundry becomes its own person in the laundry room, taking shape to scare Reed when he runs in there to throw away a diaper.

And once I've done what needs to get done, isn't it silly of
me to wait until my children are in bed? After all, if their needs are met, if my house is livable and clean, and if there looms nothing before me but time....why not? Why wait to be who I want to be? (A healthy wife and mom whose house is clean, children are played with, taught, fed, and clean, and who reads and photo's every now and then?) Why procrastinate?

I read something a long time ago on some blog or other about how if we're bored in our lives as mothers at home, it's our own fault. Something to the effect of (help me out here, Crystal) "If you're bored, go sit in the shade at a playground and read a book and eat an apple while your kids run free!" Make your day-to-day life something you're excited about.

So anyway, those are just the thoughts running through my mind as I sit in my messy ocean of a living room--I'm "waiting" for this post to be done so I can go clean. :) Hee hee.....

Lastly, I haven't said much at all about the kids lately. Reed starts kindergarten tomorrow, and that's all I'm typing about that, because I'd rather not start my day off in tears. Jaxon has finally decided naps are worth his while again, and Savvy is walking and starting to talk. (Her latest? Me-me. As in "Will you give that to ME?")

Posts forthcoming about my visits from my sisters, as well as my kids' darling partnerships. But for now, just a few photos.
I love the expression on her face in the picture below. "What? I'm not allowed to play with wipes? Why ever not, Mother dearest? "

4 comments:

Kate said...

I love the pictures of your kids. They are getting so big. Each and every new avenue that they experience is so hard for us moms. I am so glad that I have been able to be a part of those with my kids.

Andrea said...

I get into the same thing. Like last night I really wanted to get back from my VTing interview to read a book, but then I chatted with people (which was worthwhile) and when I got back the kiddos needed to get put in bed, and I need to run to the store, then the dishes really needed to be done. Often I do put off those other things, but I did get all that stuff done. And, I stayed up late and finished my book. And, then I didn't want to get up this morning. Kids climbing all over me and playing in my room got me to finally get up (ok, it was probably the stench coming from J's diaper that really motivated me).

camilla said...

Jaxons hair is looking VERY light in some of these pictures. It's insane! One pic, i was like reed, ...no jax. izzy's tears say i'm done typing. lol.

Abby said...

So true! I find that I'm often trying to shake off that WAITING feeling.

I LOVE that orange ginghamy shirt Savvy's wearing!