My Family: Maddie

 {Madelyn} * Kathryn * Me * Abigail * Elizabeth * Isaac * Reed

Madelyn is currently a student at BYU-Hawaii. She likes Reese's Puffs cereal, reading my old journals, creating art, original humor, laughing, sleeping with soft & cushy blankets, exploring new places, and probably likes long walks on the beach. ;) She's a winning combination of sass and sweetness, which I imagine has been instrumental in her beautiful handling of being the youngest of the family. She's our baby, and usually she doesn't mind. She's full of surprises, starting with her birth, when we were all convinced she was a boy. (My mom was most convinced.) She is also the only other girl in the family who has brown eyes, and once I saw her newborn self, all pink and new in the bassinet, I was perfectly okay with sharing the title of "Daddy's Brown-Eyed Girl".

What brings you most happiness? Feeling people’s love and loving them back

What would you say is your occupation currently, and/or what would you prefer it to be in the future? Currently I’m a student, and in the future I hope to have a job that’s quirky and exciting and teaches me lots of new things. For example: lumberjack supervisor (a real job!)

What is your favorite memory with Rae? (my secret selfish motive comes to light) What ISN’T a favorite memory with Rae?  Here’s one: one time in belgium, me and rae were throwing big rocks into this pond just for fun. i was 8 and she was 15. while we were throwing rocks this grumpy guy came out of his house and started yelling at us in french. i was really scared. rae understood some french so she told me he was saying that we shouldn't throw the rocks in the pond because it will block the pipes. i don't know the rest really, it's kind of vague. rae probably remembers this better. i just remember thinking rae was really cool for knowing what he said and that afterwards when we left and i said i didn't like him because he scared me and hurt my feelings the way he yelled at me (and i had no idea what i'd done wrong) she was totally consoling.

What makes you laugh really hard? Tons of things make me laugh! But I tend to laugh really hard when I’m hangin out with friends and one of us or all of us does something funny, or when I watch a good show or youtube video.

What are three of your favorite family memories? (Long, short, silly, otherwise--whichever)

Hmm... I will just choose the first 3 that come to the top of my mind since this is kind of a tough one. Family memories... 1. We went to Denmark together. We saw Hans Christian Anderson's museum, we went to Legoland (SO FUN!), we saw the statue of the Little Mermaid, we had mind blowingly yummy ice-cream, and we rode and slept overnight on a Ferry. Plus, Qait got ice-cream on our car window and we left it there for years. We thought it was hilarious. 2. This summer we all got together at Grandma Garmann's house. Everybody was sick, except for Isaac. Healthy invincible Isaac, haha! Us girls stayed up one night in Mom's hotel room all together on the bed talking and laughing. 3. Um.... I know! When we were living in Hinesville Georgia, Isaac came to visit us for a while! :D He got to meet Rae's squeeze, Phill, and we had tons of fun drawing, playing with toads in the backyard (who died in the hot tub) and eating too much cinnamon toast. :)

What do you do to relax? Take a nap, go to the beach, make dinner, zone out, get on the computer, watch TV… anything different from the unrelaxing thing that I AM doing.

Three books you love 1. The Count of Monte Cristo- It’s the coolest story ever, and it’s also the longest book I’ve ever read. I had to read it for school, and I felt so accomplished when I was done! 2. Slumdog Millionaire- I couldn't put it down! 3. The Outsiders- I know it's popular and that bugs me because to me I feel like I loved it first. This book makes me cry and it makes me happy at the same time because of the struggles the main characters face but also the relationships they have with each other

Two favorites of all the places we've lived as a family? 1. Belgium (fun time, lotsa good memories, beautiful place) 2. Japan (I learned a lot and grew a lot there, made some wonderful friends there, and experienced lots of cool new things!)

What do you love about where you live now? My roommates are nice and my house is right across from the beach! Oh yeah!

Tell us about your family (your kids, spouses, people who make your life joyous and full, people you are happy to be surrounded by....)

My friends are awesome. My closest friends are Amanda, Becca, and Brandon. Amanda and Becca are so dear to me. I can tell them anything and I always feel good around them. They help me to be closer to Christ and I know they're both strong in the gospel. At the same time, we laugh together so much and do so many silly things... every Sunday we have make dinner together. It's a tradition I wouldn't give up for the world. Brandon takes me surfing a lot and actually does a lot of favors for me. His house is always available if I have nowhere else to go (they invited me there on Thanksgiving!) He has a car which has come in handy, and right now I'm using his bike since mine was stolen or something. I just feel close to him because I feel like we understand each other well, and I think he's a really fun and sweet guy. We've had plenty of interesting talks.

What does your dream home look like? (maybe this question looks superficial, but I'm actually really curious about each of your answers to this one, since my own answer is pretty solidly cemented in my mind) 

My dream home isn't something I daydream about often. Maybe that will happen when I actually buy my own home. Something cozy and clean and warm, with lots of people inside.

Do you have pets? Tell us about them, and maybe briefly share a memory of one of the pets we had as a family.

Oh my goodness! I don't have any pets right now but anyone who really knows me well will know that Elroy will forever live in my heart as the sweetest, cutest, funniest cat to ever grace my presence. One of my best memories of him is this night in Iowa when I was 12 and I was lying in bed, not really asleep yet. For some reason I felt a wave of loneliness. I felt really, really lonely. And then out of nowhere Elroy bounded up onto my bed and chortled all happily. He snuggled up to me and I felt instantly better, just like that! We fell asleep with him purring. He slept with me like that all the time :)

What do you like to create? What makes you feel most create-ive? I really like to create doodles of little scenarios. Like comics, only with less effort put into them. I like to try to write interesting journal entries. I like teaching spiritual thoughts for church and coming up with small lessons. I like to draw, to write stories and make up characters. Anything can inspire me, I never really know what will get to me next. Honestly? These two cartoons really make me want to draw: Phineus and Ferb and The Powerpuff Girls. They draw really cool looking people. I notice these things.

What do you love to eat? Steak!! Macaroni and cheese. Chocolate milk. Milk chocolate. Grape juice with ice. Burgers, eggs, avocados, TONS OF THINGS

What is your favorite thing about where you are right now? (This can be Where You Are as in the state or city you're in, or Where You Are as in what your life is like, etc...)

What I love, love, love about Hawaii is... surfing! It's so much fun!!




 

The Lord works in miraculous ways

Once upon a time, there was such baby-hunger in my heart that I could hardly handle it. I prayed (fervently, consistently) that either 1) we would have the funds necessary to make a baby a reality -or- 2) that I would simply stop being so hungry.

For months, long long months, I prayed for relief.

And then friends started to get pregnant. Lots of friends. Close friends, faraway friends, neighbors, you name it.

I had a brief and bright moment of "Everyone-Is-Pregnant-But-Me"....and then continued to pray. Asking that Heavenly Father would give me whatever I needed.

I thought maybe I needed to understand this feeling. Maybe I need to learn what it is to want a baby, given that I have been spared from ever feeling that before now.(post-edit to clarify: I WANTED all my babies...but I have never had to try very hard at all. I am well aware that that, in itself, is miraculous, and a blessing.)

Maybe I needed to understand that what I want is not always what I need.

Whatever the reason, I prayed and I waited, watching bellies grow and waiting for the worst/best part--those babies--the deliveries.

My dear sister Qait came to visit, and shared with me the news of her budding pregnancy while we stood in the kitchen. She just slipped in the announcement, almost unnoticed, amongst our otherwise-boring conversation. I hugged her close and felt a mix of aching and joy. I sat next to her on the couch each night as she nourished her body with foods I made, watched her rest, and watched her tiny swelling of a belly grow in miniscule proportions during her stay. I quietly relived the earlier months of my pregnancies, and felt some sense of happiness in watching my sister experience it for her second time. 

And then on December 31st, I got to hold the still-very-new twin girls of Cara, one of my dear friends. 

I breathed in their new-baby scent, smoothed the fine layer of hair on their heads, examined at great length the fingers, toes, folds, nooks, and soft curves of their perfect little bodies. I felt an ache, and worried that this was not good for me, and silently begged in prayer. And that is when something miraculous happened. Filling me up, bottom to top, was peace. The aching wasn't gone, but much less, and finally manageable. In its place was the ability to enjoy the little bodies in my arms, the understanding that I don't know the timeline God has in store for me, but that he will give me ways to handle whatever it brings. Longing. Loneliness. Unwillingness to let time go at its proper fast pace.

I held another perfect newborn only days later, and again was filled with peace. And something else was added--patience. I finally FELT what I have been trying to feel, which is, "I can wait. I can wait for whatever is to come. What I have is enough, and it is alright if it's all I ever have."

And then my sweet and dear friend, Sarah....

Sarah, who has kept me informed and allowed me to almost-obsess over her pregnancy. Sarah, who even asked me to document the birth, something so sacred and so personal. A part I miss most. And here is where I really begin to understand that God doesn't give us things we can handle, though it sometimes feels that way.

Sarah had a practice run, otherwise known as prodromal labor, an extended and painful episode (complete with back labor) that had her, her husband, and me in the hospital on Sunday night. (I would like to state for the record "prodromal" does not always mean "false" and most definitely not "ineffective") And while it didn't amount to much that Sarah could see, it proved instrumental for me. (Sorry, Sarah...I grew at your expense.) Once again I was watching someone I love and reliving the moments I miss--and once again that longing was tempered. I least expected to feel relief in watching my friends and family go through the experiences I crave so much, but I firmly believe--actually, I know, I know for myself--that God knows what I need. He knows how to teach me, how to help me, and most definitely, how to give me more than what I want.

So....with a lot of gratitude in my heart as it is, I'm thanking my pregnant and/or new mom friends for their (however unaware) participation in what has been a healing and learning process in the last few months for me. All my love to you.

The Army....

....can be like an indecisive child.

Ah, well. No harm done in this instance--

Phill's orders to move to Spokane have been revoked.

Meaning, we're staying here! Meaning: Reed will go to the same school for the fourth year in a row (something I never did), we will live here longer than 3 years (never did that, either), Jax will get to start kindergarten at a school he's already quiet familiar with (three cheers for familiarity) AND...we can just...keep doing what we're doing! Or try and and shoot our roots a little deeper and buy a house?

Who knows.

All I know is, I'm happy. I am feeling watched-over and unbearably blessed. Heavenly Father answered with a resounding YES to the prayers I didn't really dare utter. (The thoughts whispered heavenward went something like, Please can it just NOT happen?)

My Family: A Series

My friend Jenn once said to me that she wishes she had a little directory of all my siblings, so that when I mention them (as I often do), she'd know just who I was talking about. I started to do just that--gathering a photo of each of them, compiling little factoids about each of them, and then I became very overwhelmed and stopped.

I was realizing, though, that I do the same thing here--I mention my siblings a lot, and I do often share personal memories that involve them--but I wish I could introduce each one of them to you. One of the things I love about my sisters is that they tend to love and care for anyone I love and care for. Friends included. Which means that my sisters, by extension, care about you, my readers and friends, and love you, too....and although some of you readers know each one of my sisters, I thought it would be fun to do a little series about them, and my brothers, and my parents.

So hold on to your hats! As soon as I have the first "interview" compiled, I'm posting it! I'm so excited for you to "meet" my family.

The case of the rogue sock wrinkle

For Thanksgiving just a couple months ago, we decided to go to California to see my sister, Abby, and her family. The trip there is six hours, and about four hours in, we were ready for a break. We stopped at an Arby's, got our orders (which were fantastically disgusting, I'd like to say) and sat down at a table. There was only one more family in the dining area, sitting all the way across the room from us.

So we sit down, and we're all happy and eating, and then Savvy starts to cry. And then panic. And she's yelling (loud enough for it to reverberate off the walls of the place), "My foot! There's something on my foot! My foooot!!" So Phill quickly comes to the rescue, unlacing her pink Converse and sliding it off.

With shaky hands, she reaches down, and we can see that her sock has sort of slipped and formed a little fold, an annoying little bump near the toe. She whips the sock off, and then laughs with relief, actually near tears in her happiness. Then, feeling free and joyous, she yells loudly enough for all to hear, "OH! It was just a NIPPLE! A nipple in my shoe!" 

I'm still puzzling that one out.